Do Others Influence Your Restaurant Choices?

How many times have you gone to a restaurant with the best intentions but ended up with your hand in the bread basket as you ordered steak frite? Ever hear of the saying Monkey See Monkey Do? Well there’s a good chance that your restaurant choices were influenced by your dining companions! Researchers have shown that our food choices as well as the amount of food we eat are influenced by the people around us. We ultimately want to conform to the perceived norm and fit in with the group. But it doesn’t have to be this way! It’s time to learn some tactics for stopping this monkey behavior … or your weight, cholesterol or blood sugar will creep up.

The typical New Yorker spends a lot more time in restaurants than in their own kitchen. We know restaurants are filled with hidden calorie bombs ranging from oversized portions, hidden fats and tempting extras like bread, wine and desserts. But I bet you didn’t consider the fact that your dining partner can be one of the strongest influencers of your eating and drinking behaviors! Think about your restaurant “behaviors” are when you are with certain people. Personally, I’ve realized that I tend to eat faster when I’m with my boyfriend having sushi (but not other cuisines) or drink more wine with certain friends. I’d encourage you to analyze your behaviors with various dining companions and come up with a plan!

Here are some of the most common problems along with my proposed solutions:

Bread basket
You don’t need me to tell you that diving into the bread basket isn’t best idea if you’re trying to watch your calories and carbs. You start out with good intentions, but there is something about seeing your dining companion eat bread that somehow makes it ok for you to do the same. I’ve actually noticed this with my own friends. Once someone digs in, everyone follows.

Tip:  Go into the restaurant with a plan to avoid the bread. It helps not to be hungry so have a light snack before. If possible, subtly push the bread basket away. But if on the other you hand, you love the bread at a certain restaurant, try to order an appetizer  vs. an entree. It will save you extra calories so you can enjoy a piece of bread or two. 

Not so healthy entree choices
You have intentions of ordering fish and vegetables, but when your dining companions order short ribs and steak frites, your brain switches gears. If they’re eating it, so will you. You want to fit in with the crowd and eat the “fun food”. Perhaps you also don’t want to make them feel bad about what they’re eating. But when you really think about it, why is eating a jumbo steak or pasta Alfedo more “festive” or fun than eating grilled fish and vegetables? And you aren’t responsible if your friends feel guilty about what they choose in restaurants. Stick to your healthy routine and you soon may find them taking your lead.

Tip: Order your entree first if possible that way you won’t be swayed by others. Check out the menu ahead of time and plan what you will order. Think about how good you will feel leaving the restaurant pleasantly full instead of bloated.

Alcohol
Your dining companion orders a great bottle of wine. So of course you feel obligated to help finish it. Or you’re at a business dinner where the wine is flowing freely. You want to fit in with your colleagues …

Tip: If dining with just one other person, tell them up front that you’d rather order by the glass as you plan on taking it easy tonight. No further explanation needed. If your dining partner insists on ordering a bottle, drink REALLY slow. Drink a lot of water as well. If your companion insists you drink more, I’d say it’s their problem … not yours! Stick to the one glass you planned on. Group diners are easier. Chances are if you have a glass in front of you, no one will even pay attention to how much you drink. They’re probably more concerned with getting their own glass filled. Bottom line, talk a lot, drink water and drink slow! 

Eating speed
Have you ever had dinner with someone who seemed to have their head in a feedbag and finished their meal in 15 minutes? (This was my bf until we had a “little chat” about eating speed. I must be so fun to date!) I also have girlfriends who eat and drink with manic speed. I find myself doing the same. Monkey behavior on my end. Strange and annoying but it happens. The problem with eating too fast is that the meal isn’t as enjoyable and you often end up eating and drinking too much. Pic credit

Tip: If you know you’ll be going out with your “fast” friends, make it a point to slow down your rate of eating and drinking. The trick is the same as the one above, drink a lot of water, talk (a lot!) and slow down your pace!

A few more thoughts …
I don’t want to give the impression that you always have to eat healthy in restaurants. Everyone likes to splurge on occasion – if that is what YOU want to do. But the problem is when you continually let your food and drink choices be influenced by others. I’m suggesting that you really think about your actions in restaurants. If you want to make healthy choices, do it! Maybe others will take your lead and improve their eating habits! And if they don’t and/or make comments about your choices, it’s their problem, not yours. They are likely jealous of your willpower or healthy tastes. Smile and let it roll off you!